June 6, 2017

D– Denial       E- Enrage    A-Acknowledgement & Adjustment    T-Torment      H-Harmony

After experiencing the tragic loss of a loved one, weeks of denial, envelopes our whole being. We launch a brew of extreme anger in our minds. I describe this anger as ‘launch’ because it mentally feels like a rocket launching. It starts off slowly and then being to take momentum until it reaches full blast.

Enraged by the feelings of loneliness and longing, it feels like your world is crumbling around you. You feel numbness but simultaneously feel anger and rage awakening like a beast within your soul. The questions of wonder…. “Where is your loved o...

June 6, 2017

D– Denial    E- Enrage    A-Acknowledgement & Adjustment      T-Torment     H-Harmony

Following on from my introduction blog on grief after the loss of someone special, the first stage of healing is actually Denial. Everything I write about is an accumulated expressions of feelings, thoughts and behaviours experience by my patients, friends or family after they underwent an emotional roller-coaster of heart ache and pain after losing a loved one.

My personal encounters is my greatest learning especially when I lost my beautiful Dad, Prem in 1992. Seeing someone I love, wither away in just over two weeks, is a challenge to explain. I was 19 years old, in universi...

June 6, 2017

It’s been an extremely difficult few year in my family because the dark, forbidden shadow was cast on loved ones, who left us behind. So I have had my fair share of grieving and bereavement. I had to use my knowledge and expertise to re-programme my mind so that I could feel happy again. Yes, I’ve learned how to live again, with that extreme void; I’ve learned how to cry but smile at the same time thinking of all the great memories we shared with the family that is no longer with us. Besides healing myself, I had to find ways, as a therapist, to help my patients through the hardest times in their lives, that is when death invites itself into their lives.

So how do we take it one step at a time? How do we learn to live without eve...

January 26, 2017

We've all been there and done that!!! Haven't we? When we realise that something isn't right in our lives and living becomes a mundane act of our reality, many of us acknowledge that it is time to change. Re-organising and tweaking what we do can be daunting for some individuals, especially if they don't know where to start. For others, it might be refreshing...similar to a spring clean. When your home seems to become a stagnant zone, what do you do? We de-clutter, shift furniture around, get rid of things we haven't used in a while and take them down to the local charity shops or we may even freshen up the walls with a coat of paint. All of these are great to change your physical environment and get the energies flowing again b...

January 26, 2017

I was teaching some 9 year olds a few relaxation techniques today. It was just amazing to see how a classroom full of excited, noisy, bubbly and effervescent children, react to a calm voice. As I told them to take a deep breath in and feel their lungs and abdomen expand with air, they gently closed their eyes. The melancholy music in the background complimented the tone of my voice whilst sparking a feeling of comfortable relaxation in them.

My narration of  walking along the beach with the warm sun hitting against their skin as the seagulls dived in and out of the deep blue sea, became the focal point for their unconscious minds to conjure up images from past experiences. The meditation and creative visualisation start...

December 30, 2016

I haven't blogged anything for the last 3 weeks. Whenever I took my Ipad to do some writing, it was a challenge for me to scribe my feelings and views. I had to take time out to contemplate on what was stopping me. Then it dawned on me how emotional I have been since the new year. It's weird how your ideas and creativity struggles to break through your thoughts when your mind and heart has a bit of sadness. After the most beautiful Christmas and new year holidays with family and friends, celebrating the festivities and excitement of 2016, we had to say goodbye to family visiting us.

It got me thinking that my life, very similar to many others around the world, is stringed together with pining he...

February 26, 2016

Yesterday, a new patient walked into my therapy room, sat across me and poured her heart out. After years and years of allowing others to control her….she was close to breaking point. This control was not just physical but mental attachments. She felt weighed down and her life felt like it stood still. I instantly resonated with her and empathised with her pain. Many years ago, I had a deep rooted connection with my late dad, who passed away when I was only 19. I felt guilt mixed with  sadness and anger towards him, for leaving us at such a young age. It took many years of me living a life with an empty numbness in my heart.

Although I had amazing things happening around me like marrying my soulmate, starting my beautiful family...

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Podcasts: The Smiling Guru from JSC

Do you need some motivation to change? Have a listen to The Smiling Guru giving tips on various topics to have a stronger and happier mindset.  You can listen to these podcasts on anchor, spotify, apple podcast and many other platforms for free. 

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